1 00:00:04,914 --> 00:00:07,052 See, you have to understand, I love my father. 2 00:00:07,190 --> 00:00:08,639 I love him a tremendous amount. 3 00:00:08,776 --> 00:00:11,536 Yes, but it's very hard. He's over at the house all day, every day. 4 00:00:11,673 --> 00:00:13,398 Yeah, I mean, you know, "Honor thy father." 5 00:00:13,536 --> 00:00:14,707 That's gotta be easily 6 00:00:14,845 --> 00:00:16,885 one of the top 5 or 6 commandments, don't you think? 7 00:00:17,638 --> 00:00:18,890 Paul's very busy right now trying 8 00:00:18,914 --> 00:00:20,294 to choose his next project. 9 00:00:20,432 --> 00:00:22,339 It's a tense time for him, and it's very difficult 10 00:00:22,363 --> 00:00:24,569 with Burt clamoring for attention every second. 11 00:00:24,707 --> 00:00:25,983 Yeah, but then I think about 12 00:00:26,121 --> 00:00:28,500 all that he's done for me my entire life. 13 00:00:28,638 --> 00:00:30,442 And I want to extend myself in return, you know? 14 00:00:30,466 --> 00:00:31,649 He's saying if it goes on much longer, 15 00:00:31,673 --> 00:00:32,787 he's going to jump out a window. 16 00:00:32,811 --> 00:00:33,983 This is what I'm saying. 17 00:00:34,569 --> 00:00:35,569 Uh-huh. 18 00:00:37,293 --> 00:00:38,293 "Uh-huh?" 19 00:00:38,949 --> 00:00:39,949 Uh-huh. 20 00:00:41,500 --> 00:00:43,018 "Uh-huh?" 21 00:00:49,845 --> 00:00:50,982 I think the thing is, 22 00:00:51,120 --> 00:00:53,673 My mom, see, she recently took a job. 23 00:00:53,811 --> 00:00:55,718 You know those little cards you get in pants pockets 24 00:00:55,742 --> 00:00:57,431 that say, "Inspected by number 12?" 25 00:00:57,569 --> 00:00:59,017 Uh-huh. She's number 12. 26 00:01:00,638 --> 00:01:02,373 Well, you know, it just seems to have created 27 00:01:02,397 --> 00:01:03,717 some sort of problem between them. 28 00:01:03,844 --> 00:01:05,569 And, uh, I think, 29 00:01:05,706 --> 00:01:08,155 I think my dad wants to go back to work himself, 30 00:01:08,293 --> 00:01:09,717 but he's not... I think, I think he's envious. 31 00:01:09,741 --> 00:01:11,341 Honey, he's over at the apartment all day 32 00:01:11,397 --> 00:01:12,810 in his slippers, happy as a clam. 33 00:01:12,948 --> 00:01:14,544 I don't think he wants to go back to work. 34 00:01:14,568 --> 00:01:16,086 Well, you know. Uh-huh. 35 00:01:16,879 --> 00:01:18,079 Well, what do you think it is? 36 00:01:18,155 --> 00:01:19,362 Paul, rather than 37 00:01:19,499 --> 00:01:21,672 jumping to some snap judgment of my own, 38 00:01:21,810 --> 00:01:23,844 why don't we investigate what you think it is? 39 00:01:25,913 --> 00:01:27,568 Well, again, I, I think... 40 00:01:27,706 --> 00:01:29,106 I think he wants to go back to work. 41 00:01:29,810 --> 00:01:30,879 Uh-huh. 42 00:01:31,017 --> 00:01:32,337 And I think he's wearing slippers. 43 00:01:34,188 --> 00:01:35,672 Uh-huh. 44 00:01:35,810 --> 00:01:37,924 Could you possibly say anything else besides "uh-huh"? 45 00:01:37,948 --> 00:01:38,948 Oh, we're out of time. 46 00:01:40,223 --> 00:01:41,223 Very good. 47 00:01:41,361 --> 00:01:42,568 Oh, now, before you go, 48 00:01:42,706 --> 00:01:44,568 you haven't RSVP'd to my fund-raiser 49 00:01:44,706 --> 00:01:46,465 for the Habitat For Humanity. 50 00:01:46,603 --> 00:01:47,603 Yeah. Yeah. 51 00:01:47,672 --> 00:01:48,878 Here's the thing about that. 52 00:01:49,016 --> 00:01:50,499 We want to go... Yeah. 53 00:01:50,637 --> 00:01:52,637 We believe in humanity. 54 00:01:52,775 --> 00:01:56,188 And, uh, we feel it should have a habitat. 55 00:01:56,327 --> 00:01:58,337 It's just, I hope you won't take this the wrong way, 56 00:01:58,361 --> 00:02:00,327 we're not sure we're entirely comfortable 57 00:02:00,465 --> 00:02:02,671 with the idea of seeing you socially. 58 00:02:03,430 --> 00:02:05,050 Uh-huh. 59 00:02:05,188 --> 00:02:07,843 But simply because, you know, you know all our stuff. 60 00:02:07,981 --> 00:02:09,223 Which is okay in this room. 61 00:02:09,361 --> 00:02:11,095 In this room, that's perfectly, you know, appropriate. 62 00:02:11,119 --> 00:02:12,399 Yeah, but in a social situation, 63 00:02:12,533 --> 00:02:13,878 I think we'd be thinking... 64 00:02:14,016 --> 00:02:16,256 We'll be thinking, "hey, she knows all our stuff." Right. 65 00:02:16,740 --> 00:02:19,085 And how would that make you feel? 66 00:02:19,223 --> 00:02:21,326 Well, we decided that we just... 67 00:02:21,464 --> 00:02:23,636 It'd just, you know, be blicky. 68 00:02:28,809 --> 00:02:30,256 "Blicky?" 69 00:02:30,395 --> 00:02:32,429 Yeah, that's what we decided. A little blicky. 70 00:02:36,291 --> 00:02:38,602 Jamie, do you feel that it might be blicky? 71 00:02:39,636 --> 00:02:42,429 Well, I mean, I feel it might be blicky. 72 00:02:42,567 --> 00:02:45,740 Don't you feel it might conceivably be blicky? 73 00:02:45,877 --> 00:02:49,118 Whether I feel it would be blicky or not is not the issue. 74 00:02:49,256 --> 00:02:52,256 The issue is do you feel it might be blicky? 75 00:02:53,808 --> 00:02:56,704 So you're saying just we should come to the fund-raiser. 76 00:02:56,842 --> 00:02:57,956 Well, how would you feel about that? 77 00:02:57,980 --> 00:02:59,256 We'll just see you there. 78 00:03:04,739 --> 00:03:07,118 Good god! PAUL: What? 79 00:03:07,256 --> 00:03:08,877 The person in charge of our mental health 80 00:03:09,015 --> 00:03:11,084 has that hanging in her house. 81 00:03:12,187 --> 00:03:13,497 Good god! 82 00:03:15,084 --> 00:03:16,394 Hey! What? 83 00:03:17,670 --> 00:03:18,704 What is this? 84 00:03:18,842 --> 00:03:20,635 Hey, how are you? 85 00:03:20,773 --> 00:03:22,221 Please tell me she has a dog. 86 00:03:22,359 --> 00:03:23,739 I haven't seen a dog. Oh, good god. 87 00:03:24,704 --> 00:03:26,497 Glad you came? Yeah, really glad. 88 00:03:26,635 --> 00:03:28,049 Hi! Hi. 89 00:03:28,186 --> 00:03:29,428 I'm so glad you could make it. 90 00:03:29,566 --> 00:03:31,325 Well, thanks. You have a lovely home. 91 00:03:31,463 --> 00:03:33,083 Yes. Some lovely knickknacks. 92 00:03:33,601 --> 00:03:34,911 Thanks. 93 00:03:35,048 --> 00:03:36,635 Oh, Bruce and Janet, 94 00:03:36,773 --> 00:03:38,428 This is Jamie and Jose. 95 00:03:41,325 --> 00:03:42,773 It's Paul, actually. 96 00:03:43,083 --> 00:03:44,083 What? 97 00:03:44,186 --> 00:03:46,221 Paul. You just called me Jose. 98 00:03:46,359 --> 00:03:47,601 No, I didn't. 99 00:03:50,772 --> 00:03:52,772 Whoo, hey there, gimlet boy. 100 00:03:52,910 --> 00:03:53,910 Where you goin'? 101 00:03:56,876 --> 00:03:59,325 Ooh, nothing but joy here. Yeah. 102 00:03:59,910 --> 00:04:01,117 Good god! 103 00:04:01,255 --> 00:04:02,600 What the hell is that? 104 00:04:02,738 --> 00:04:04,221 We honestly don't know. 105 00:04:04,359 --> 00:04:05,719 But the artist is right behind you. 106 00:04:05,841 --> 00:04:06,910 No! No. 107 00:04:07,048 --> 00:04:08,083 I'm kidding. I'm sorry. 108 00:04:08,221 --> 00:04:09,807 Paul, Jamie Buchman. Hello. 109 00:04:09,945 --> 00:04:10,945 Sydney, Sydney warren. 110 00:04:11,083 --> 00:04:13,427 I can't, I can't believe this thing. 111 00:04:13,565 --> 00:04:15,748 Yeah, well, whatever you do, don't look at the table behind us. 112 00:04:15,772 --> 00:04:17,841 Why? What's on the table... Oh, come on! 113 00:04:17,979 --> 00:04:18,979 Told you not to look. 114 00:04:19,083 --> 00:04:20,738 Tell me, tell me there's a dog. 115 00:04:20,876 --> 00:04:22,082 No dog. 116 00:04:22,220 --> 00:04:23,876 It's a party, for God's sake. 117 00:04:24,014 --> 00:04:26,174 Couldn't she put something on the table like a cracker? 118 00:04:27,220 --> 00:04:28,703 Are you a patient of Sheila's? 119 00:04:28,841 --> 00:04:31,082 I'm a fellow shrink, actually. How about you? 120 00:04:31,220 --> 00:04:33,289 Oh, we're actually patients of Sheila's. 121 00:04:33,427 --> 00:04:35,196 Oh, okay, so you must be pretty scared right now. 122 00:04:35,220 --> 00:04:36,393 Yeah. 123 00:04:36,772 --> 00:04:38,116 Yeah. 124 00:04:38,254 --> 00:04:40,393 Don't be fooled. She's a very, very good doctor. 125 00:04:40,531 --> 00:04:42,230 No, I'm sure. Of course she is. No question. 126 00:04:42,254 --> 00:04:44,840 But when this woman leaves the office, 127 00:04:44,978 --> 00:04:46,185 she really leaves the office. 128 00:04:46,324 --> 00:04:47,427 Yes, yes... 129 00:04:47,565 --> 00:04:49,116 See, that's what we should do, honey. 130 00:04:49,254 --> 00:04:50,644 Get a couple of these around the apartment, 131 00:04:50,668 --> 00:04:51,747 And that'll scare my dad away. 132 00:04:51,771 --> 00:04:53,564 Oh, right. Your father? 133 00:04:53,702 --> 00:04:55,254 Long story. 134 00:04:55,393 --> 00:04:57,402 Please. I'm desperate not to see any more of the apartment. 135 00:04:57,426 --> 00:04:59,944 My mom just took a job, so he's going through a thing. 136 00:05:00,082 --> 00:05:01,737 I think, I think he's envious. 137 00:05:01,875 --> 00:05:03,013 How old is your father? 138 00:05:03,151 --> 00:05:04,323 Uh, he's almost 70. 139 00:05:05,668 --> 00:05:08,151 He's not envious. He feels abandoned. 140 00:05:08,288 --> 00:05:10,737 He's what? Nine times out of ten cases like this, 141 00:05:10,875 --> 00:05:11,915 that's exactly what it is. 142 00:05:12,013 --> 00:05:13,047 Oh, god, honey. 143 00:05:13,184 --> 00:05:14,909 That's what it is. 144 00:05:15,047 --> 00:05:18,167 You know what I'm gonna do? I'm gonna write a check to the Habitat For Humanity 145 00:05:18,253 --> 00:05:20,633 and go home and try not to dream about anything I saw here. 146 00:05:21,737 --> 00:05:22,977 It was nice talking to you. 147 00:05:23,115 --> 00:05:24,795 Nice talking to you, too. Nice to meet you. 148 00:05:28,977 --> 00:05:31,530 Okay. Are you thinking what I'm thinking? 149 00:05:34,599 --> 00:05:35,599 Apparently not. 150 00:05:36,874 --> 00:05:39,046 That's what a therapist should be like. 151 00:05:39,184 --> 00:05:41,461 What do you mean? He's a person. 152 00:05:41,599 --> 00:05:43,530 He is. A person with answers. 153 00:05:43,667 --> 00:05:45,467 Yeah, see, he didn't have all those questions. 154 00:05:45,495 --> 00:05:47,229 What are your feelings? How are your feelings? 155 00:05:47,253 --> 00:05:48,368 Your feelings. Your feelings. Your feelings. Your feelings. 156 00:05:48,392 --> 00:05:49,437 All right, sweetie, we get it. 157 00:05:49,461 --> 00:05:51,529 I'm sick of paying $100 an hour 158 00:05:51,667 --> 00:05:53,667 so that some woman can make me crazy. 159 00:05:53,805 --> 00:05:55,125 Yeah, you don't need her for that. 160 00:05:56,150 --> 00:05:57,598 I'm agreeing with you! I'm agreeing. 161 00:06:06,632 --> 00:06:10,287 But, honey, you know, we've got a fine, fine therapist of our own there. 162 00:06:10,632 --> 00:06:11,908 Jacuzzi! 163 00:06:18,149 --> 00:06:20,907 Pauly, they're gonna love your film about mole rats. 164 00:06:21,045 --> 00:06:23,218 Hey, hey, it's Natalie Allen! 165 00:06:23,356 --> 00:06:24,770 Yes, it is. All right. 166 00:06:24,907 --> 00:06:26,947 So good, get him, get him on the phone. Let's do it. 167 00:06:27,080 --> 00:06:29,976 It's Natalie Allen, anchorwoman for CNN. 168 00:06:30,114 --> 00:06:32,322 I see it right there on the set. Thank you. Okay. 169 00:06:32,460 --> 00:06:34,149 Any ideas? How do you pitch to Ken Burns? 170 00:06:34,287 --> 00:06:35,322 Taste this. What, oh! 171 00:06:36,391 --> 00:06:37,460 Dad, thank you. Okay. 172 00:06:37,598 --> 00:06:39,218 Here you go, Pauly. Hang on one second. 173 00:06:39,356 --> 00:06:41,183 Hello. Ken Burns' office, please. 174 00:06:41,322 --> 00:06:44,769 Look at Natalie Allen. Oh! Oh! 175 00:06:44,907 --> 00:06:47,287 She's so smart, and she looks so great. 176 00:06:47,424 --> 00:06:49,769 And she finds out about everything right away. 177 00:06:51,597 --> 00:06:53,252 Yeah, Ken, hi. Paul Buchman. How are you? 178 00:06:53,390 --> 00:06:54,469 Listen, do you have two minutes? 179 00:06:54,493 --> 00:06:56,528 Maybe we can talk about mole rats. 180 00:06:56,666 --> 00:06:58,735 Good. Here, listen, here's what I was thinking... 181 00:06:58,873 --> 00:07:01,804 Natalie Allen says it, I believe it. 182 00:07:01,942 --> 00:07:04,080 The Serbs are mad at the Croats? 183 00:07:04,217 --> 00:07:06,942 Yes! El nino, el facto! 184 00:07:09,459 --> 00:07:10,838 Yeah, no, sorry. That's my dad. 185 00:07:10,976 --> 00:07:12,804 He's, he's over for just right now. 186 00:07:12,942 --> 00:07:14,390 What I would do, personally, 187 00:07:14,528 --> 00:07:16,804 I think we should go naked mole rat by naked mole rat 188 00:07:16,941 --> 00:07:18,321 until you find a naked mole rat 189 00:07:18,459 --> 00:07:19,872 that you just can't help but love. 190 00:07:20,010 --> 00:07:22,044 Pauly, guess what's on here? 191 00:07:22,182 --> 00:07:23,227 Pop, I'm on the phone. So can... 192 00:07:23,251 --> 00:07:24,768 You're thinking mustard, aren't you? 193 00:07:24,906 --> 00:07:25,951 I thought it was mustard. Yes. 194 00:07:25,975 --> 00:07:27,113 Worcestershire. Ha ha! 195 00:07:27,251 --> 00:07:28,251 Okay, I'm wrong. 196 00:07:29,217 --> 00:07:30,699 Sorry about that. Um, What I... 197 00:07:31,906 --> 00:07:33,286 Whenever something tastes good, 198 00:07:33,424 --> 00:07:34,699 and you don't know what it is, 199 00:07:34,837 --> 00:07:36,251 it's usually Worcestershire. 200 00:07:36,390 --> 00:07:37,734 Thank you. Hang on one second. 201 00:07:37,872 --> 00:07:39,124 Hey, you know who invented Worcestershire sauce? 202 00:07:39,148 --> 00:07:40,297 Who? Benjamin franklin. 203 00:07:40,321 --> 00:07:41,527 Oh, come on. No, it's true. 204 00:07:41,665 --> 00:07:43,297 It was just after he got hit by lightning. 205 00:07:43,321 --> 00:07:45,251 He didn't mean to. He was going for ketchup. 206 00:07:47,389 --> 00:07:48,596 Hey. 207 00:07:48,734 --> 00:07:51,596 Oh, you would not believe the pants I saw today. 208 00:07:51,734 --> 00:07:53,285 Unwearable. 209 00:07:53,423 --> 00:07:54,917 Ken, I'm gonna have to call you back. All right? Thank you. 210 00:07:54,941 --> 00:07:56,320 And inspector number 10, 211 00:07:56,458 --> 00:07:58,458 she passed them right through like she always does. 212 00:07:58,596 --> 00:08:00,147 I mean, what does she care? 213 00:08:00,285 --> 00:08:03,112 She only got a job because she slept with inspector number 5. 214 00:08:04,250 --> 00:08:06,330 That happens all the time in that business, Aunt Syl. 215 00:08:06,389 --> 00:08:08,423 You go in for the love of quality control, 216 00:08:08,561 --> 00:08:09,699 you stay for the sex. 217 00:08:11,458 --> 00:08:13,147 Hiya, Mom. Hi. 218 00:08:13,285 --> 00:08:15,043 You're not going to say hi to pop? 219 00:08:16,043 --> 00:08:17,043 Hi! 220 00:08:17,147 --> 00:08:18,147 Oh, hi. 221 00:08:18,871 --> 00:08:21,320 Oh, Natalie Allen... again. 222 00:08:22,078 --> 00:08:23,078 Uh-huh. 223 00:08:23,596 --> 00:08:24,630 Good for you. 224 00:08:26,664 --> 00:08:27,664 That's it? 225 00:08:28,629 --> 00:08:29,629 What? 226 00:08:31,147 --> 00:08:32,147 What? 227 00:08:35,250 --> 00:08:36,354 None of my business. 228 00:08:41,698 --> 00:08:43,871 Grab a seat. Dr. Warren will be in in just a minute. 229 00:08:44,009 --> 00:08:45,457 Thank you. Thanks. 230 00:08:45,595 --> 00:08:48,491 Wow! This... this is a room. 231 00:08:48,629 --> 00:08:50,871 Honey, look at the fire! 232 00:08:51,009 --> 00:08:54,249 Wow! This is a room where you get well. 233 00:08:54,388 --> 00:08:57,249 Hmm. Now, listen, do me a favor. 234 00:08:57,388 --> 00:08:59,905 What? Don't do what you did with Sheila. 235 00:09:00,042 --> 00:09:02,698 What? We're starting fresh here with a new person. 236 00:09:02,836 --> 00:09:04,111 Don't poison the well. 237 00:09:05,802 --> 00:09:07,002 That's what I did with Sheila? 238 00:09:07,077 --> 00:09:08,491 I poisoned the well? 239 00:09:08,629 --> 00:09:11,146 You put incorrect notions about us in her head. 240 00:09:11,284 --> 00:09:12,733 We were never able to get them out. 241 00:09:13,353 --> 00:09:14,870 Like what? 242 00:09:15,008 --> 00:09:16,939 It doesn't matter now. No, but like what? 243 00:09:17,077 --> 00:09:18,215 A billion things. 244 00:09:18,353 --> 00:09:19,388 Like what? 245 00:09:19,526 --> 00:09:20,835 Like that we hate cats. 246 00:09:22,560 --> 00:09:25,457 What? Sheila thinks we hate cats. 247 00:09:25,594 --> 00:09:26,708 This is what you're worried about? 248 00:09:26,732 --> 00:09:28,559 That this guy will think we don't like cats? 249 00:09:28,697 --> 00:09:31,077 It bothered me. It came up more than once. 250 00:09:31,215 --> 00:09:33,904 She thinks we hate cats, which means we're dog people. 251 00:09:34,042 --> 00:09:35,973 Not just people who like dogs, dog people, 252 00:09:36,111 --> 00:09:39,008 which means we are needy, not giving. It bothers me. 253 00:09:42,180 --> 00:09:43,318 What is wrong with you? 254 00:09:43,904 --> 00:09:44,904 Hey! Hi. 255 00:09:45,008 --> 00:09:46,288 Sit down. Sit down. How are you? 256 00:09:46,318 --> 00:09:48,318 Relax, relax. Did you eat? I got Zabar's. 257 00:09:48,697 --> 00:09:49,697 Oh. 258 00:09:51,248 --> 00:09:52,421 Uh, no, thank you very much. 259 00:09:52,559 --> 00:09:54,628 I try not to eat before I'm going to spill my guts. 260 00:09:54,766 --> 00:09:57,456 Come on. Come on. Come on. Dive in. 261 00:09:57,594 --> 00:09:59,214 I'm way wildly too nervous to eat. 262 00:09:59,352 --> 00:10:00,712 Don't be nervous. Don't be nervous. 263 00:10:00,801 --> 00:10:01,948 Let me see if I can scare up a pen. 264 00:10:01,972 --> 00:10:03,525 Okay. 265 00:10:03,663 --> 00:10:05,801 I like that painting very much. 266 00:10:05,938 --> 00:10:08,869 Oh, thanks. That's a local artist named, uh, Robert Katz. 267 00:10:09,007 --> 00:10:10,007 Oh, we love cats. 268 00:10:15,248 --> 00:10:19,834 I, uh, must say I was a little surprised to get this call. 269 00:10:19,972 --> 00:10:21,558 Yeah. Do you feel it's unethical 270 00:10:21,696 --> 00:10:23,903 to visit one shrink while you're seeing another? 271 00:10:24,041 --> 00:10:25,248 Absolutely not. 272 00:10:25,387 --> 00:10:27,041 Really? This happens all the time. 273 00:10:27,179 --> 00:10:29,086 You know, I think I lost a patient to Sheila once. 274 00:10:29,110 --> 00:10:30,386 Pfft. Hard to imagine that. 275 00:10:32,110 --> 00:10:34,386 It's just a question of who clicks with whom, you know? 276 00:10:34,524 --> 00:10:36,364 Besides, the point is, you did the right thing. 277 00:10:36,834 --> 00:10:38,420 Okay, good. 278 00:10:40,213 --> 00:10:41,247 I'll have a bagel. 279 00:10:41,386 --> 00:10:43,282 Great. All right, let's go to work. 280 00:10:43,420 --> 00:10:45,351 The other night, you were talking about 281 00:10:45,489 --> 00:10:47,247 your father hanging around all the time. 282 00:10:47,386 --> 00:10:50,731 And you said that maybe he feels abandoned by my mom. 283 00:10:50,869 --> 00:10:52,293 You were absolutely right, by the way. 284 00:10:52,317 --> 00:10:54,662 Yeah, so I was trying 285 00:10:54,800 --> 00:10:57,144 to get in touch with my feelings about... 286 00:10:57,282 --> 00:10:59,833 Come on, you know your feelings about this. You're a nice guy. 287 00:10:59,971 --> 00:11:02,006 You want your parents to be happy. 288 00:11:02,144 --> 00:11:05,075 And also, you have a life you'd like to lead occasionally, 289 00:11:05,213 --> 00:11:06,420 If nobody minds. 290 00:11:08,764 --> 00:11:09,764 Yeah. 291 00:11:13,626 --> 00:11:16,317 So, the question is, what do you do? 292 00:11:16,455 --> 00:11:17,799 Yes, okay, yes, what do I do? 293 00:11:17,937 --> 00:11:19,386 What's he do? What is it? 294 00:11:20,488 --> 00:11:22,902 Is your father going to come over again tomorrow? 295 00:11:23,040 --> 00:11:24,085 Tomorrow? What is tomorrow? 296 00:11:24,109 --> 00:11:25,309 Is tomorrow a day of the week? 297 00:11:25,419 --> 00:11:26,419 Absolutely. 298 00:11:26,488 --> 00:11:27,523 He'll be there. 299 00:11:27,661 --> 00:11:29,040 Paul, here's what you gotta do. 300 00:11:29,178 --> 00:11:30,350 You gotta engage him. 301 00:11:30,488 --> 00:11:32,109 You gotta get him to admit 302 00:11:32,246 --> 00:11:34,454 that he resents your mother taking the job. 303 00:11:34,592 --> 00:11:35,730 Yes. Yes. 304 00:11:35,868 --> 00:11:37,937 My guess is on some level, he wants you to. 305 00:11:38,075 --> 00:11:39,246 Mm-hmm. 306 00:11:39,385 --> 00:11:40,706 I mean, here's what he's probably thinking. 307 00:11:40,730 --> 00:11:43,177 "Here I am, finally in the golden years of my life, 308 00:11:43,316 --> 00:11:45,695 "and this woman has given me the shaft." 309 00:11:45,833 --> 00:11:47,557 Probably. Yeah. Definitely! 310 00:11:47,695 --> 00:11:49,246 Now, once you get him going, 311 00:11:49,385 --> 00:11:50,868 once you get him to acknowledge it, 312 00:11:51,005 --> 00:11:52,706 he'll, you know, he'll do the rest by himself, 313 00:11:52,730 --> 00:11:54,454 and then all your problems will be solved. 314 00:11:54,592 --> 00:11:56,039 Yes, yes, yes. 315 00:11:58,039 --> 00:11:59,039 You've been saying that? 316 00:11:59,108 --> 00:12:00,246 I've been thinking it. 317 00:12:01,212 --> 00:12:02,246 How is that, good? 318 00:12:04,660 --> 00:12:06,419 Dr. Warren, I am sorry to disturb. 319 00:12:06,557 --> 00:12:07,901 Mrs. Arthur's on the phone again. 320 00:12:08,039 --> 00:12:09,557 Is she humming? Mm-hmm. 321 00:12:09,694 --> 00:12:10,694 I better take this. 322 00:12:11,523 --> 00:12:13,039 This is a dear older woman, 323 00:12:13,177 --> 00:12:15,694 and, for her, I bend the rules. No problem. 324 00:12:15,832 --> 00:12:17,316 I'll be right back. Sure. No problem. 325 00:12:18,316 --> 00:12:20,832 Okay. I love him. Me, too! 326 00:12:20,970 --> 00:12:22,360 I'll tell you what we're gonna do, my little friend. 327 00:12:22,384 --> 00:12:24,384 What's that? We're dumping Sheila. 328 00:12:24,522 --> 00:12:25,660 Really? Yeah. 329 00:12:25,798 --> 00:12:27,591 You like him more. I like him more. 330 00:12:27,729 --> 00:12:30,556 Yeah, okay, yeah. We're gonna dump Sheila. All right. 331 00:12:30,694 --> 00:12:32,867 But, you know, let's just not do it cold turkey. 332 00:12:33,005 --> 00:12:34,556 I think it'll be a lot kinder 333 00:12:34,694 --> 00:12:37,005 if we just taper off with Sheila over time 334 00:12:37,142 --> 00:12:38,798 while we continue to see him. 335 00:12:38,936 --> 00:12:40,296 You want to pay for two therapists? 336 00:12:41,729 --> 00:12:42,936 Maybe a clean break is best. 337 00:12:50,280 --> 00:12:52,014 The way I see it, Ken, 338 00:12:52,038 --> 00:12:54,969 The story of the mole rat is the story of all of us. 339 00:12:56,073 --> 00:12:58,315 Oh, God! Look at her today. 340 00:13:01,728 --> 00:13:03,522 It's really, it's about 341 00:13:03,659 --> 00:13:06,315 the little naked rodent in all of us, Ken. 342 00:13:06,453 --> 00:13:09,176 And, and to me, I think it's a fascinating documentary. 343 00:13:09,315 --> 00:13:10,669 Smell this. What? Pop, I'm on the phone. 344 00:13:10,693 --> 00:13:11,831 You see I'm talking to Ken. 345 00:13:11,969 --> 00:13:13,728 Let me ask you something. What's that? 346 00:13:13,866 --> 00:13:15,245 Who was the genius 347 00:13:15,383 --> 00:13:17,935 that first let milk lay around and get all moldy 348 00:13:18,073 --> 00:13:19,314 and all of a sudden realized, 349 00:13:19,452 --> 00:13:21,038 "You know what that is? Cheese." 350 00:13:23,107 --> 00:13:24,947 I don't know who was the first guy that did it. 351 00:13:25,073 --> 00:13:27,073 You can do a documentary about that. 352 00:13:29,073 --> 00:13:30,314 Sorry. That's my dad again. 353 00:13:30,452 --> 00:13:32,014 Ken, I'm gonna have to call you back. So sorry. 354 00:13:32,038 --> 00:13:35,279 You think Ted Turner chooses his anchorwomen himself? 355 00:13:35,417 --> 00:13:37,348 It could be, pop. You know, I don't know. 356 00:13:37,486 --> 00:13:39,003 I want to ask you something. Sure. 357 00:13:39,141 --> 00:13:40,934 I'm gonna sit down and talk for a second. 358 00:13:43,141 --> 00:13:44,762 It's all right. It's all right, uh. 359 00:13:45,693 --> 00:13:46,865 How ya doin'? Good. 360 00:13:47,003 --> 00:13:48,003 Yeah? Yeah. 361 00:13:48,037 --> 00:13:49,279 Good. Yeah. 362 00:13:49,417 --> 00:13:51,210 Here's a question. Did you, just thinkin', 363 00:13:51,348 --> 00:13:53,348 did you have any, I don't know, 364 00:13:53,486 --> 00:13:55,899 any anger or any feelings 365 00:13:56,037 --> 00:13:58,796 when mom took the job at the factory? 366 00:13:58,934 --> 00:14:00,383 No! Why should I have any feelings? 367 00:14:00,521 --> 00:14:02,692 If she wants to spend our retirement inspecting pants, 368 00:14:02,830 --> 00:14:04,037 who am I to say no? 369 00:14:04,175 --> 00:14:06,013 No, no, but, yeah, but no, that's okay. Hold it. 370 00:14:06,037 --> 00:14:08,761 But really, there was no sense of anger? No. 371 00:14:08,899 --> 00:14:09,899 No? No. 372 00:14:09,968 --> 00:14:10,968 No resentment? Nah! 373 00:14:11,520 --> 00:14:12,520 Abandonment? 374 00:14:13,141 --> 00:14:14,934 Well... Yeah? 375 00:14:15,072 --> 00:14:16,289 Yeah? A little sense of abandonment? Oh. 376 00:14:16,313 --> 00:14:18,382 W-w-well... Or, or betrayal? 377 00:14:18,520 --> 00:14:20,623 Mmm... Ill feelings, maybe, or disgruntled. 378 00:14:20,761 --> 00:14:22,161 All right! All right! Yes! Yes! Yes! 379 00:14:22,278 --> 00:14:23,934 I feel abandoned! Yes. 380 00:14:24,072 --> 00:14:25,313 She gave me the shaft! 381 00:14:25,451 --> 00:14:27,589 She did? Yes! 382 00:14:27,727 --> 00:14:30,071 46 years we worked so we wouldn't have to work. 383 00:14:30,209 --> 00:14:31,968 We could just be together. Right. 384 00:14:32,105 --> 00:14:33,796 And what does she do at that precious time? 385 00:14:33,934 --> 00:14:35,140 She gives you the shaft. Yes! 386 00:14:35,278 --> 00:14:36,933 Yeah! That's not right. 387 00:14:37,071 --> 00:14:38,071 You know what? What? 388 00:14:38,105 --> 00:14:39,623 I'm going over there. 389 00:14:39,761 --> 00:14:41,358 I'm going to have a little talk with her! This has gone far enough! 390 00:14:41,382 --> 00:14:43,278 Well, all right. Great. That's a great idea. 391 00:14:43,416 --> 00:14:45,347 Uh, before you go! Before you go, Pop. Yeah? 392 00:14:45,485 --> 00:14:46,485 Put on some pants. 393 00:14:47,002 --> 00:14:48,071 Oh, oh. 394 00:14:51,416 --> 00:14:53,633 All right. Listen, we're gonna be tough and honest with Sheila, 395 00:14:53,657 --> 00:14:55,622 and just get this thing over with. Yes, of course. 396 00:14:55,760 --> 00:14:58,553 Just an iota of compassion, that's all I'm asking you for. 397 00:14:58,691 --> 00:14:59,691 I'm compassionate. 398 00:14:59,795 --> 00:15:01,209 I'm plenty compassionate. 399 00:15:01,347 --> 00:15:03,002 All right. All right. 400 00:15:03,140 --> 00:15:04,909 What kind of bagels do you think Sheila will bring? 401 00:15:04,933 --> 00:15:05,933 All right. 402 00:15:07,760 --> 00:15:09,415 Hi. Hi, Sheila. 403 00:15:10,036 --> 00:15:12,415 Okay. Let's see. 404 00:15:12,553 --> 00:15:13,933 When last we left, 405 00:15:14,071 --> 00:15:16,415 we were investigating your feelings vis-a-vis Mort. 406 00:15:20,104 --> 00:15:21,312 Who? Burt. 407 00:15:22,312 --> 00:15:23,312 That's what I said. Yeah. 408 00:15:24,864 --> 00:15:28,277 Since then, we've actually taken some actual steps. 409 00:15:28,415 --> 00:15:29,864 You have? Yes, we have. 410 00:15:30,001 --> 00:15:33,242 We engaged my father, and we got him to talk about it, 411 00:15:33,381 --> 00:15:36,277 and, uh, frankly, it worked, because he just, you know, 412 00:15:36,415 --> 00:15:38,357 Picked up and walked out of the apartment on his own. 413 00:15:38,381 --> 00:15:39,415 Uh-huh. 414 00:15:39,553 --> 00:15:40,553 Here we go. 415 00:15:41,932 --> 00:15:43,690 What? Nothing. 416 00:15:43,828 --> 00:15:45,759 So how do you feel about your solution? 417 00:15:45,897 --> 00:15:47,346 Well, 418 00:15:47,484 --> 00:15:50,242 Great. We feel great about our solution. 419 00:15:50,381 --> 00:15:51,828 Well, good. Yeah. 420 00:15:51,966 --> 00:15:55,104 Maybe now we should examine any separation anxiety 421 00:15:55,242 --> 00:15:57,242 you may have with the departure of your father. 422 00:15:57,381 --> 00:15:58,966 That's just what we're gonna do. 423 00:16:03,863 --> 00:16:07,242 Jamie, I'm, I'm sensing a certain hostility from you today. 424 00:16:07,380 --> 00:16:09,207 Are ya? Okay. You know, you know. 425 00:16:11,897 --> 00:16:13,276 Sheila, here's the thing. 426 00:16:13,414 --> 00:16:15,207 We've decided to change therapists. 427 00:16:17,276 --> 00:16:18,276 Uh-huh. 428 00:16:19,449 --> 00:16:21,587 Yeah. Sheila, believe me, it-it's not you. 429 00:16:21,725 --> 00:16:24,000 Honey. It's a little bit you. 430 00:16:24,138 --> 00:16:26,552 We're finding our sessions frustrating 431 00:16:26,690 --> 00:16:27,863 and, frankly, unhelpful. 432 00:16:28,000 --> 00:16:30,172 Well, of course, this comes as a great shock. 433 00:16:30,311 --> 00:16:32,449 Well, we're sorry. We really are. 434 00:16:32,587 --> 00:16:35,827 And something of a personal and professional disappointment. 435 00:16:35,965 --> 00:16:37,483 We understand. We really do. 436 00:16:37,621 --> 00:16:41,518 But part of my job is to accept such a decision with grace 437 00:16:41,655 --> 00:16:44,414 and with all good wishes for your future happiness. 438 00:16:44,552 --> 00:16:46,311 Well, thank you. That's very sweet of you. 439 00:16:46,449 --> 00:16:50,345 Uh... but I would be remiss if I didn't mention to you 440 00:16:50,482 --> 00:16:51,907 that I think you're making a mistake. 441 00:16:51,931 --> 00:16:53,079 Yeah. Well, listen, you know... 442 00:16:53,103 --> 00:16:54,583 I've seen this sort of thing backfire. 443 00:16:54,689 --> 00:16:56,482 Well, perhaps it will. We can only hope... 444 00:16:56,620 --> 00:16:57,827 I have a question for you. 445 00:16:59,586 --> 00:17:00,655 Please. 446 00:17:00,793 --> 00:17:02,275 Have you thought about my feelings? 447 00:17:06,138 --> 00:17:09,018 Sheila, we never... You're not the first ones to run out on me, you know. 448 00:17:09,517 --> 00:17:10,586 We wish you all the best. 449 00:17:10,724 --> 00:17:12,413 You know it's my birthday in two weeks? 450 00:17:14,275 --> 00:17:16,344 Well, if we don't see ya, have a happy birthday. 451 00:17:16,482 --> 00:17:18,862 You're just, you're just stupid! 452 00:17:18,999 --> 00:17:20,275 You're both really stupid! 453 00:17:20,413 --> 00:17:21,827 Well, be that as it may... 454 00:17:21,964 --> 00:17:23,844 You're rolling the dice with your mental health, 455 00:17:23,895 --> 00:17:26,458 which I gotta tell ya Is not exactly the Rock of Gibraltar to begin with. 456 00:17:26,482 --> 00:17:27,999 Hey! Well, fine. You know... 457 00:17:28,137 --> 00:17:31,137 You deserve every drop of misery that God will send to you! 458 00:17:32,033 --> 00:17:33,147 You, you know what, Sheila... 459 00:17:33,171 --> 00:17:34,688 A pox! A pox on your house! 460 00:17:35,861 --> 00:17:37,171 I think our time is up. 461 00:17:37,310 --> 00:17:38,389 Yeah. Actually, we have 45 minutes... 462 00:17:38,413 --> 00:17:41,206 Honey! Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. 463 00:17:41,344 --> 00:17:43,464 Maybe we could pro rate or get a voucher or something? 464 00:17:43,516 --> 00:17:47,447 I'm gonna tell everyone I know everything I know about you! 465 00:17:48,723 --> 00:17:50,412 And then I'm gonna make some stuff up! 466 00:17:55,999 --> 00:17:57,378 How ya doin', Syl? 467 00:17:57,516 --> 00:17:59,654 Oh, please, Burt, I'm at work. 468 00:17:59,792 --> 00:18:01,205 Call me Inspector. 469 00:18:02,033 --> 00:18:03,309 Oh. Sorry, inspector. 470 00:18:03,447 --> 00:18:05,343 Uh, everybody, this is Burt. 471 00:18:05,481 --> 00:18:08,343 Burt, this is 2, 4, 6, 8 472 00:18:08,930 --> 00:18:09,964 and 10. 473 00:18:12,447 --> 00:18:14,688 The odds are out smoking again. 474 00:18:15,861 --> 00:18:17,101 Nice to meet ya. 475 00:18:20,723 --> 00:18:21,792 Don't mind 10. 476 00:18:21,929 --> 00:18:23,894 See, before I came here, anything went. 477 00:18:24,032 --> 00:18:26,722 Now people show some respect for a job well done. 478 00:18:26,860 --> 00:18:30,309 Yeah, we're a real gung-ho bunch now, thanks to you. 479 00:18:31,343 --> 00:18:32,929 So why are you here anyway, Burt? 480 00:18:33,067 --> 00:18:35,239 Uh, Sylvia, I am angry with you. 481 00:18:35,378 --> 00:18:36,412 You are? Yes. 482 00:18:36,549 --> 00:18:38,274 Why? Because you took this job, 483 00:18:38,412 --> 00:18:39,549 because you abandoned me. 484 00:18:39,687 --> 00:18:40,687 You gave me the shaft. 485 00:18:40,825 --> 00:18:41,825 I gave you the shaft? 486 00:18:41,894 --> 00:18:43,309 You know what I'm saying. 487 00:18:43,446 --> 00:18:46,274 You gave me the shaft in what should have been our golden years! 488 00:18:46,411 --> 00:18:48,860 Well! You seem to be recovering very nicely, 489 00:18:48,998 --> 00:18:51,549 you and, uh, that Natalie Allen. 490 00:18:51,687 --> 00:18:53,860 Well, at least she looks at me when she talks to me. 491 00:18:55,998 --> 00:18:57,584 Well, you know, I have somebody, too. 492 00:18:57,722 --> 00:18:59,204 Who? Tiger Woods. 493 00:18:59,342 --> 00:19:00,446 What? 494 00:19:00,584 --> 00:19:03,411 Yes! He's a very handsome young man. 495 00:19:03,549 --> 00:19:07,031 And he can hit a 3-wood 290 yards off the fairway. 496 00:19:07,169 --> 00:19:09,204 Now, I'm not exactly sure what that means, 497 00:19:09,342 --> 00:19:12,997 but it certainly sounds very, very impressive. 498 00:19:13,135 --> 00:19:16,031 Sylvia, all my life I've been waiting for the day 499 00:19:16,169 --> 00:19:17,904 when I could be sitting around in my living room 500 00:19:17,928 --> 00:19:20,515 and in my underwear with you next to me. 501 00:19:20,653 --> 00:19:23,411 So now I'm in my living room and in my underwear, 502 00:19:23,549 --> 00:19:24,962 but you're not there! 503 00:19:28,859 --> 00:19:30,721 Burt, is there anything I should worry about, 504 00:19:30,859 --> 00:19:32,480 you and this Natalie Allen? 505 00:19:32,617 --> 00:19:33,997 Well, Frankly, no. 506 00:19:34,135 --> 00:19:37,238 In the end, when all the fireworks have died down, 507 00:19:37,377 --> 00:19:39,308 I'm not sure I need that much news. 508 00:19:40,308 --> 00:19:41,445 Good. 509 00:19:41,583 --> 00:19:43,824 Is there anything that I should worry about 510 00:19:43,962 --> 00:19:45,548 with you and Tiger Woods? 511 00:19:46,859 --> 00:19:49,824 No! I mean, he's on the road so much. 512 00:19:49,962 --> 00:19:51,652 Who needs that? 513 00:19:54,617 --> 00:19:56,824 What do you say we take a little walk? 514 00:19:56,962 --> 00:19:58,307 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 515 00:19:58,445 --> 00:20:00,962 You'll cover for me, number 10? 516 00:20:01,099 --> 00:20:02,099 Yep. 517 00:20:02,893 --> 00:20:04,755 He's cute. Nice rise. 518 00:20:10,410 --> 00:20:12,479 And we haven't heard from Pop since. 519 00:20:12,617 --> 00:20:14,652 That's great. I'm glad everything worked out. 520 00:20:14,789 --> 00:20:15,996 All thanks to you, Mister. 521 00:20:16,134 --> 00:20:17,892 I'm sorry Sheila blew up like that. 522 00:20:18,030 --> 00:20:19,272 That's, that's too bad. 523 00:20:19,410 --> 00:20:20,937 You know what? That's all the proof we needed to know 524 00:20:20,961 --> 00:20:22,341 that we did the right thing. 525 00:20:22,479 --> 00:20:25,134 You don't suppose there really is a pox on our house, do you? 526 00:20:25,651 --> 00:20:26,927 No. No. 527 00:20:27,547 --> 00:20:29,616 Good, oh, God! 528 00:20:29,754 --> 00:20:32,272 We've gone half an hour over. I'm so sorry. 529 00:20:32,410 --> 00:20:33,696 Just relax. Sit, sit, sit, sit, sit. 530 00:20:33,720 --> 00:20:35,754 Relax, relax. We're doing good work. 531 00:20:35,892 --> 00:20:37,307 I don't like people to feel rushed. 532 00:20:38,616 --> 00:20:40,754 Whew. You better watch that attitude, pal. 533 00:20:40,892 --> 00:20:42,812 You're gonna get thrown out of the Shrinks Union. 534 00:20:44,375 --> 00:20:46,134 Thank you for the wonderful advice 535 00:20:46,271 --> 00:20:48,306 and the equally wonderful Kung Pao chicken. 536 00:20:48,444 --> 00:20:50,754 Yeah. Sorry. Once again, we forgot to bring you anything. 537 00:20:50,892 --> 00:20:53,167 We were just, we were raised poorly is all. 538 00:20:53,306 --> 00:20:57,167 Listen, at these prices, the food's on me. 539 00:20:57,306 --> 00:20:58,786 I keep meaning to ask you, by the way, 540 00:20:58,823 --> 00:21:00,685 how much do you charge, if we may? 541 00:21:00,823 --> 00:21:02,547 $475 an hour. 542 00:21:10,271 --> 00:21:12,478 We made a huge mistake. 543 00:21:14,340 --> 00:21:17,133 We were stupid, stupid people. 544 00:21:18,029 --> 00:21:19,282 I don't know what we were thinking. 545 00:21:19,306 --> 00:21:20,995 Oh, and, by the way, happy birthday. 546 00:21:33,408 --> 00:21:35,202 Why did I get so upset when they dumped me? 547 00:21:36,512 --> 00:21:37,512 I don't even like 'em. 548 00:21:39,581 --> 00:21:40,581 Because you're a nut. 549 00:21:42,512 --> 00:21:43,581 I am? 550 00:21:43,719 --> 00:21:45,443 You're completely out of your mind. 551 00:21:47,753 --> 00:21:49,097 I am, aren't I? 552 00:21:49,235 --> 00:21:50,615 You shouldn't be advising anybody. 553 00:21:51,339 --> 00:21:53,166 You're probably right. 554 00:21:53,305 --> 00:21:55,028 It's a crazy world, isn't it? 555 00:21:55,166 --> 00:21:56,822 They're crazy. I'm crazy. 556 00:21:56,959 --> 00:21:59,132 It's just a world filled with crazy people. 557 00:22:00,443 --> 00:22:01,650 Yeah. 558 00:22:01,788 --> 00:22:02,788 Thank God. 559 00:22:38,787 --> 00:22:40,856 Why did I get so upset when they dumped me? 560 00:22:41,959 --> 00:22:43,096 I don't even like 'em. 561 00:22:44,683 --> 00:22:45,683 Because you're a nut. 562 00:22:47,821 --> 00:22:49,131 I am? 563 00:22:49,269 --> 00:22:50,752 You're completely out of your mind. 564 00:22:53,373 --> 00:22:54,476 I am, aren't I? 565 00:22:54,614 --> 00:22:56,649 You shouldn't be advising anybody. 566 00:22:56,787 --> 00:22:57,787 You're probably right. 567 00:22:58,889 --> 00:23:00,511 It's a crazy world, isn't it? 568 00:23:00,649 --> 00:23:02,304 They're crazy. I'm crazy. 569 00:23:02,442 --> 00:23:04,442 It's just a world filled with crazy people. 570 00:23:05,648 --> 00:23:06,648 Yeah. 571 00:23:07,131 --> 00:23:08,131 Thank God.